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ROAD FOOD
By the Motorcycle Monster
When
traveling as much as a busy Motorcycle Monster does, one of the important
parts of hotel/road comfort (if there is such a thing)
is having the ability to get a little snack or small meal together in the
room or on the roadside without packing everything including the kitchen
sink in your saddlebag. Old stand-bys like granola
bars, single portion boxes of Cheerios, cookies, jerky, and the oldest of
all portable Monster travel fair, Vienna sausages , out of a can with some
crackers have given many road dogs like the Monster, a full tummy before
taking a roadside nap. When the
Monster broke down several years ago he even sank so low as to open a can
of Spam under a dark overpass on Interstate 65 in Indiana. That’s what I
call yummy “finger food”.
I
just can’t remember how many lonely nights the Monster has cozied up to
a bowl of Captain Crunch and a few of those delicious Vienna on Triskets.
Today, with the advent of packaged foods that don’t require
refrigeration until opened, we can broaden our horizons with foiled
packages of tuna, boxed Dinty Moore beef stew, and even some mysterious
soy milk in a package that will ride in your leather saddlebag until the
dinner-time candles are lit. Hormel has a complete line
of package dinners that are quite tasty and quick and easy with a little
help from a micro wave.
As
motels have made coffee pots in our rooms a regular amenity, delicacies
like Ramen Noodles, and other dry packed soups and teas have made it
possible to have a tasty warm dish at the Motel 6, complements of the Mr.
Coffee. There is no end to the creativity that many
pose when it comes to adding goodies to their “Hot Water Ramen”.
A little hot sauce, Ketchup, Vienna, Ritz crackers, in a warm cup
of Ramen, wow! This all sounds a lot like when the
Monster ate mush for two weeks straight while broke and in college in the
70’s.
The
Monster most recently has heated several types of hog dogs and sausages in
the hot water of the Mr. Coffee. Not only can you get a
“great warm meal” well maybe not that great, “a warm meal”, but
you can also keep it warm for a while on the Mr. Coffee hot plate. Hotdogs
have lots of red dye and preservatives so you are “sort of safe”
carrying a package of hot dogs around for an hour or two in your shirt
pocket till you can get from the “Piggy Wiggy” to the Best Western.
With the ice bucket and the aid of the AC unit, those Hog Dogs will stay
good for days.
Of
course with the breakfast buffets available at most motels today, I
usually have some stolen, I mean “free fruit” and a “half day old”
biscuit or two, hidden away in the sock drawer. If they
happen to make the mistake of including a small mini bar type refrigerator
in my room, I gladly empty those over priced bottles of sparkling water
onto the other bed in lieu of cold fruit, milk, and other delicious
goodies commandeered at the AM Breakfast Buffet. Don’t forget to return
them before the bean counter arrives and breaks the bank with 3.00 bottles
of H2O..
After
an extended wait in a Sea Food restaurant in Florida recently, the
Monsters latest girlfriend noticed that the Monster was warming up to some
shrimp sauce and saltines. After remarking how
disgusted she was to watch the Monster eat such a terrible mix, she caved
in to her own hunger pains and gave it a try. Needless
to say, the Monster girlfriend now packs saltines with ketchup packs in
her fanny pack for those moments when you really need a ketchup fix.
One
of my favorites, that I recently saw updated on the Cooking Network by
genius chef and avid 2 wheeled rider, Alton Brown is the instant oatmeal
in the Mr. Coffee gourmet breakfast. I have already
used the warm water of Mr. Coffee to heat my instant Quaker Oats and
Honey, but Alton added the idea of making it with Herbal Tea with honey or
jelly from the small restaurant packs.
The
Tea idea opens up vast array of grommet ideas of great teas with all types
of cookies and packaged scones and French pastries. While
in New Orleans a few years ago, the Monster carried benits for days to
relive the special culinary delicacy over again. If
he had only thought of Alton’s Herbal Tea a la Mr. Coffee. Well
anyway, be creative, and make the most of the open road.
Make
that stop at Wally World, and pick up some solid road food. Ramen
Noodles and Vienna Sausages have never been better.
For questions contact, www.motorcyclemonster.com or call corporate offices
c/o MRA (Motorcycle Riders Association)
Attn: Dawn Sundean
947 South Florida Ave
Lakeland, Florida 33803
Phone 866-333-1829
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