Dodging Bullets and Arriving Alive
Okay all ya'll Scooter Jockeys, listen up: This tale is more important than those “wet- t” adventures I usually expound upon while sippin’ on my Jim Beam elixir with my feet dangling in Cindy’s pool. I have some important safety info for everyone who braves the highways on two wheels. This stuff not only may keep you and your posse puttin’ along safely, it may save your life. Your ex-wives would appreciate that because when you ride off on the Big Harley in the sky, the alimony stops.
Now hold on before you start lookin’ for the next article about shining your chrome. Take some time to listen to old Pop. After puttin’ around the world for almost 40 years I’ve had my fair share of what I call “safety episodes.” I’m sure you have had them too. Remember all those times when total strangers tried to run you down for no particular reason? You know, the ones who tried to “get ya” while you were just mindin’ your own business, taking a leisurely ride down to the local parole office to visit friends. These painted nail perpetrators are everywhere these days, riding around in their mini-vans and SUV’s with one hand holding the cell phone and the other ones “spankin” the ADD kids in the back seat while the DVD player blares the Wiggles to head phone wearing brats on their way to soccer practice. Then there is the “Teenage Toyota Terror” with her 17 year-old foot on the dashboard. She’s a 97-pound high school girl (contortionist) who likes nothing better than flippin’ you off with one hand while she sucks on her Virginia Slims and holds her cell with her shoulder.
A new killer that I have had an occasional visit from on the local highways recently are the delivery truck drivers reading their freight bill while talking on the cell with the dispatcher and downing a Mickey D’s value meal all in one motion. The only task they can’t seem to master is staying in their own lane. Of course there are the old standbys… newspaper on the wheel….makeup application…..eating while driving (one hand)… eating and drinking while driving (two hands)… radio adjusting … cigarette lighting …the new millennium version, selecting CDs on your laptop, and the “all-pro masher of motorcyclists,” the “blue haired Buick” syndrome (a Florida exclusive).
Okay, now that you’re in the mood for a safe ride, let’s get to the important stuff. You know, the part about saving motorcyclists lives. Here are a few important safety tips that may add to your longevity, enhance your ex-wives financial prospects and keep you and your friends puttin’ for years to come.
Drive defensively - Always drive with your guard up. Assume the car stopped at the cross street will pull out and possibly hit you. Adjust your speed and position to give yourself “an out.” Just because you have the right of way, you are still at risk any time a cage has the opportunity to pull into your path. Assume the worst case scenario and prepare for it. Accident avoidance must be your top priority.
Be Humble - While on a motorcycle you are always at risk because of your “being out there.” You have very little protection (safety gear only) while on a motorcycle. Use all of your energy to focus on safety. Ego issues, like who had the right of way or which driver was in the wrong, have little bearing on who will sustain the injuries. Let your priority always be to keep yourself safe. A level head is key to your decision-making process. Make good route choices - Try to choose a route that is not as congested. Choose routes and times of travel that will give you the best chance for a safe arrival. Many times the safety of a group riding together is enhanced by the choice of a “not so busy” route.
Safety Training - Take Motorcycle Training classes. No matter how long you have been riding, more training is always good. Practicing skills in a controlled environment will make you a better rider and also a safer rider. It is also good to pick up tips from professionals that can enhance your skills and awareness. You’re never too good to improve your skills.
Maintain a Safe Motorcycle - Preventative maintenance is key to preventing mishaps. Take a few minutes to check the tires, cables, controls, and overall condition of your motorcycle. Proper tire pressure, timely oil changes, and regular lubrication will help keep your motorcycle in top condition. Watch for leaks and any kind of wear and tear that looks like it could present a problem. If it looks suspicious have it checked out by a professional.
Consider the Consequences - Motorcycle Riding comes with a certain amount of risk. The consequences of accidents while at excessive speeds can be devastating. Accidents occurring at speeds over 100 miles an hour many times cause death. Think about the risk and consider the consequences each time you ride. Formulate a strategy that will keep you safe and riding for years to come.
Never Ride Impaired - Riding while impaired is not only foolish but deadly. There is really not much to say other than don’t do it. If you ride while using alcohol or drugs you probably won’t ride for long. It is also important to keep your riding friends from getting on a scooter while impaired. Don’t become a statistic by over doing it and then trying to ride home. If you want to have a couple of cool ones, do it after the bikes are parked for the day. A little planning can make even the biggest biker weekends safe and free from alcohol-related episodes.
Wear Safety Gear - Probably the most ignored part of the safety equation is the importance of safety gear. The one part of the Cruiser Mentality that continues to disappoint me on a daily basis is the absence of helmets. I have heard all of the arguments about reasons for not wearing helmets. I’m sorry brothers and sisters but all of the arguments are absurd. Don’t believe the stories about how “somehow you are safer” without a helmet. You can make all of the lame excuses you want for not wearing a helmet. The fact is “Helmets Save Lives.” I agree that it’s hot, they are not comfortable, you can’t hear as well, and all of the other reasons. The bottom line is if you care about the friends and family you ride with, wear a helmet, insist they wear helmets, and before long it will become part of your safety strategy. If you ride long enough and far enough, a helmet will save you or a fellow rider in your group’s life. Motorcycle specific-jackets with armor, gloves, high top boots, and eye protection are also an important part to the safety equation. Be smart and prepare for that spill. I always say “it’s not if, it’s when.”
